Music Discussions

The Reason

Main Point of Discussion: Jesus is the only One who can totally change us. He is the only One who can set us free from sin and give us new life.

The Band:
Hoobastank may have the most interesting band name in all of rock n roll. They’re an American rock group, best known for their 2004 hit “The Reason” and “Running Away.” They formed in 1994 in Agoura Hills, California, with singer Doug Robb, guitarist Dan Estrin, drummer Chris Hesse, and original bassist Markku Lappalainen. They are signed to Island Records and have released four albums and one extended play, to date. Their fourth and most recent studio album, F-or (N)ever, was released in January 2009. They have sold 10 million albums worldwide.

Introducing the Music Video:
Even though The Reason was released in 2004, many of you may be familiar with this tune. This song could be interpreted in a variety of ways. Hoobastank probably wrote it about a girl but it could be thought of as a relationship with Jesus, or a model figure, or maybe a friend. That’s one of the reasons I like it- it’s applicable to many situations. The music itself is not revolutionary or anything but I find it interesting. Good song.

The Reason

I’m not a perfect person
There’s many things I wish I didn’t do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I’ve found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I’m sorry that I hurt you
It’s something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That’s why I need you to hear

I’ve found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You

and the reason is You [x3]

I’m not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I’ve found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I’ve found a reason to show
A side of me you didn’t know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

The YouTube Video:

Transition Statement:
This music video shows a group of people who work together to pull off a heist. But we also see the singer of the band reflecting on his role in the crime. At some points he seems to be regretful over his actions. But if we look at the lyrics of the song, that’s exactly what we see over and over again. He has found a reason to live, and that reason is another person. As Christians, we have a similar truth at play in our lives. Jesus is the reason we even have life, as well as eternal life. He is the only One who can change the old into new, and help us live a new life. Let’s talk about how this works.

Divide into Small Groups:
Let’s go ahead and split up into our discussion groups, and then afterward we’ll come back together for a final word.

CLICK HERE for a quick training article on how to maximize your small groups using our small group format—a great resource to equip your small group leaders.

Discussion Questions:

  1. AROUND THE CIRCLE: Before we get started, let’s all take a second to share our names and our favorite heist movie?

  2. ASK A FEW: Do you think that this “robbery” in the music video could really have happened?

  3. ASK A FEW: Were you surprised to find out that the woman was in on it, that she was being used by the robbers to get away with their crime?

  4. ASK A FEW: In the video, we see the lead singer almost regretting his actions: the way he lived, the way he treated his friends, what he lived for, etc. What do you think his song is about?

  5. ASK A FEW: Do you think people can be deeply changed? Why or why not?

  6. ASK A FEW: The song says, “I’ve found a reason for me, to change who I used to be, a reason to start over new, and the reason is you.” Have you ever met someone who changed you like this? If so, who was it?

  7. ASK A FEW: Granted, there are lots of things in life that can change us, but what are some of the major things in life that change us the most?

  8. ASK A FEW: Can Jesus change our lives? If so, how?

  9. Read the following passage:

      Romans 6:1-13 (NIV)

      Well then, should we keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more kindness and forgiveness? 2 Of course not! Since we have died to sin, how can we continue to live in it? 3 Or have you forgotten that when we became Christians and were baptized to become one with Christ Jesus, we died with him? 4 For we died and were buried with Christ by baptism. And just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glorious power of the Father, now we also may live new lives. 5 Since we have been united with him in his death, we will also be raised as he was. 6 Our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. 7 For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin. 8 And since we died with Christ, we know we will also share his new life. 9 We are sure of this because Christ rose from the dead, and he will never die again. Death no longer has any power over him. 10 He died once to defeat sin, and now he lives for the glory of God. 11 So you should consider yourselves dead to sin and able to live for the glory of God through Christ Jesus. 12 Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to its lustful desires. 13 Do not let any part of your body become a tool of wickedness, to be used for sinning. Instead, give yourselves completely to God since you have been given new life. And use your whole body as a tool to do what is right for the glory of God.

  10. ASK A FEW: After reading this passage, what do you think the Apostle Paul wants us to do with our sin?

  11. ASK A FEW: How does Paul say that we get the “new lives” in verse 4? What does that mean?

  12. ASK A FEW: What do you think it means to “die with Jesus” or to “die to ourselves”?

  13. ASK A FEW: What kind of “new life” is possible because of the truth in verse 11?

  14. ASK A FEW: Have you ever tried to change something about yourself, and failed? If so, what was it?

  15. ASK A FEW: The guy in the video talked about having a new reason to live and the reason was his significant other. As Christians, who is our Reason? (Leaders – Jesus. He’s the only One who can totally change us.)

  16. ASK A FEW: In verse 13, Paul talks again about living out our “new lives.” How does he say is the best way to do that?

  17. ASK A FEW: Can Jesus change anybody? Or are some people too far gone? (Leaders – Of course, the truth is EVERYONE can be changed by Jesus’ love. But let them talk this out because it may be important for some of those in your group to hear.)

  18. AROUND THE CIRCLE: How do you need to let Jesus change you right now?

Wrap Up:
Change. The music video we watched tonight seemed to think it was possible. We heard a guy talk about being made new because of someone in his life. Because of her, he had finally found a reason to live, to be himself. Wouldn’t it be great to believe that people – us included! – could be changed?!

Well, the passage of Scripture that we read tonight leads us to believe that we CAN be changed. In fact, Paul tells us exactly how to be changed: we die with Jesus and die to our sinful selves. We no longer let sin rule us and we no longer let sin be our master.

I gotta be honest; that’s a lot more difficult than it sounds. If you don’t believe me, just ask anyone who’s tried to change themselves…and failed.

The key is to not try and change yourself, but to let Jesus change you through the forgiveness He offers. That’s the ONLY way we can be new people who live new lives. Every other strategy will fail.

Do you need to make a change tonight? Is there something about you that is broken or empty or sinful? If so, why don’t you turn to Jesus and allow Him to change you? You will never have new life on your own, no matter what you do or how hard you try. The only way to be changed for good is to put your trust in Jesus.

If you need to do that, hang around after we close in prayer. Our adult leaders and myself will be very happy to talk with you about this. Trust me; you’ll be really glad you did.

Get changed tonight!

Close in Prayer

Written by Paschoal Trentini


Jonathan McKee

Jonathan McKee is the author of over twenty books including the brand new The Guy's Guide to FOUR BATTLES Every Young Man Must Face; The Teen’s Guide to Social Media & Mobile Devices; If I Had a Parenting Do Over; and the Amazon Best Seller - The Guy's Guide to God, Girls and the Phone in Your Pocket. He speaks to parents and leaders worldwide, all while providing free resources for youth workers on Jonathan, his wife Lori, and their three kids live in California.

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