Born This Way

Main Point of Discussion: Jesus loves everybody—so should we.

The Song: “Born This Way”

Lady Gaga is perhaps the biggest pop-music star on the planet. Known for her unconventional (okay…outrageous) wardrobe choices and Madonna-influenced dancing and vocal style, Gaga has been grabbing scads of awards and critical praise and millions of listeners for several years now.

“Born This Way” is the latest notch on her musical belt. Gaga sang a snippet of the tune (a fairly shameless rip-off of Madonna’s “Express Yourself”) after winning one of several MTV video music awards last September. Her fans have been, well…gaga ever since. She released “Born This Way” on Feb. 11, and it quickly hit the top of the iTunes charts. Gaga performed the single for the first time on the Feb. 13 Grammy Awards telecast, and it’s now atop the Billboard Hot 100 chart as well.

More important than the tune’s undeniable buzz is the content of the lyrics; they champion the idea of loving yourself no matter what you look like or how much money you have or if you’ve ever felt bullied or marginalized—because “God makes no mistakes.” Kudos to Gaga for singing those truthful sentiments. But intertwined with such positivity is her long-held pro-promiscuity, pro-gay agenda (see song lyrics further down). Given the popularity of “Born This Way,” it’s incumbent upon youth workers to dig into the tune and offer their students a biblical perspective, which this discussion will focus on. (For more background, check out the Source’s Youth Culture Window article on Lady Gaga and “Born This Way,” posted last week.)

You can present the song and its lyrics any number of ways, from downloading the track and playing it while your students read from lyric sheets you’ve passed around or projecting a YouTube video with the lyrics on a wall.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Scripture is clear regarding same-gender sexual sin, as it is regarding opposite-gender sexual sin—i.e., they’re both sinful; God isn’t cool with either action. Unfortunately the church has justifiably gained a reputation as a gay-hating institution by, among other things, stigmatizing homosexual sin (and homosexuality in general) to a far greater extent.

As believers in Christ, we need to end homophobia, like, yesterday. That means stopping the gay jokes in youth group; that means confronting hatred for LBGT people within our church walls and challenging believers to instead show love—at least as much as Christ loves straight people who lie, cheat, sleep around, and wallow in all manner of addiction. That also means, as a church, dealing with same-gender sexual sin by the same yardstick as opposite-gender sexual sin—neither is better, neither is worse, and no backing down from either sin.

A final word: Youth leaders must be mindful of the high probability that there are at least some teens under their care who are wondering if they’re gay or who have engaged in same-sex behaviors. And the last thing they need is a couple of Bible verses thrown in their faces while the clique off to the side giggles at yet another effeminate vocal impersonation. These kids need care and protection and listening ears and loving guidance. After all, if the church fails to love them, Lady Gaga (and her ilk) most certainly will. Please keep this in mind as you prepare this discussion.

Introducing the Song —SAY THIS:
We’re going to take a deeper look at the worldview behind the big pop song “Born This Way,” a fairly new Lady Gaga tune that most of you are probably familiar with. Let’s check it out. (Play the song or run the video.)

Song Lyrics: “Born This Way”

Divide into Small Groups:
Let’s go ahead and split into our discussion groups, and then afterward we’ll come together for a final word.

CLICK HERE for a quick training article on how to maximize your small groups using our small group format—a great resource to equip your small group leaders.

Discussion Questions:

1. AROUND THE CIRCLE: Before we dive in, everybody tell us your name and the city and state where you were born.


2. ASK A FEW: In “Born This Way,” Lady Gaga sings about getting rid of shame and guilt over things we may not like about ourselves that we can all pretty much agree that we’re born with—e.g., skin color, hair color, personality, etc. So…have any of you ever had braces or changed your hair color? (Wait for a show of hands.) How do you believe God views that sort of “messing” with his creation?


3. ASK A FEW: Have any of you ever had elective cosmetic procedures or know others who’ve had them? (Wait for a show of hands.) How do you believe God views that sort of “messing” with his creation?


4. AROUND THE CIRCLE: As you think about your peers, is changing their physical appearance in big ways becoming more of a focus these days—or is it a rare thing that’s not too much of a widespread issue?


5. ASK A FEW: In the song, Gaga sings, “a different lover is not a sin
   believe capital h-i-m.” What do you think Gaga means by “different lover”? How do you imagine the actual “capital h-i-m” is reacting to these lyric lines?


6. ASK A FEW: Later in the song, Gaga adds “no matter gay, straight, or bi,
   lesbian, transgendered” to the list of conditions she says some people are born with. What is it about those lyrics that may be attractive to some listeners? Is it the same kind of draw that “a different lover is not a sin” may have? (Leader—answer you’re looking for: It’s attractive because if promiscuity and sexual orientation are conditions we’re “born with,” then hooking up with anyone and everyone is fair game and truly okay with God. Let the good times roll!)

Read the following passage from the Bible:

Introducing the passage —SAY THIS:
Realize, you’ll hear some people try to explain away the truth of this passage, saying that this word for homosexuality meant something else, like the abuse of young boys. I assure you, it didn’t. Paul would have just said that. And there are plenty of other passages that are very clear about all these actions he lists as being sins. (Leader- if you’d like to study a little more prior to these small groups to be prepared, you can read our extensive article on the subject here.)


1 Timothy 1:8-11 (NLT)
The law was not intended for people who do what is right. It is for people who are lawless and rebellious, who are ungodly and sinful, who consider nothing sacred and defile what is holy, who kill their father or mother or commit other murders. The law is for people who are sexually immoral, or who practice homosexuality, or are slave traders, liars, promise breakers, or who do anything else that contradicts the wholesome teaching that comes from the glorious Good News entrusted to me by our blessed God.


7. ASK A FEW: What does this verse have to say about sexual immorality and homosexual acts? (Leader—answer you’re looking for: Both constitute behavior that’s unrighteous (v. 9) and contrary to sound doctrine (v. 10).)


8. ASK A FEW: What is the point of this small passage? Hint—who is God’s law for? (Leader—answer you’re looking for: God’s law- his story- is for all sinners!)

You Say: Yes, in this passage Paul lists the “sexually immoral” and those who “practice homosexuality” among the “lawless and rebellious.” It is point blank doctrine: both sexual immorality and homosexuality are lifestyles that are contradictory to the Gospel. But, look what else Paul is doing. He’s also clearly saying that God has reached out to the “lawless and rebellious” with His perfect law. Rather than condemn sinners, God desires to redeem them! (just like John 3:17 says).
9. ASK A FEW: Does the fact that “the sexually immoral” comes before “those practicing homosexuality” in the list of sins make any difference to you? What about the fact that several other sins are listed before these two? (i.e., “lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful,” etc.)


10. ASK A FEW: Gaga is correct in one sense; we ARE indeed born with original sin and the predisposition to rebel—-we ARE born this way. She’s got a good point. BUT the big difference is that original sin/sin nature has never been an excuse to keep sinning. God wants our repentance and trust in Christ’s sacrifice for forgiveness and his power to “go and sin no more.”
    Still, it’s unlikely that quoting Bible passages to fans of Gaga will change their minds. If that’s the reality, what, then, can we do in response that doesn’t involve carrying picket signs?

Read the following passage from the Bible:

Romans 12:21 (NIV 2010)
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.


11. AROUND THE CIRCLE: A lot of people hate the church because of how poorly we’ve treated non-Christians—especially those we’ve “chosen” as particularly sinful (e.g., gays, lesbians, transgendered, the promiscuous). Do you believe the church has been unfairly judged in this way by non-Christians? If so, how? If not, why not?


12. ASK A FEW: How can this verse from Romans 12 –overcome evil with good—guide us as we engage respectfully with non-Christians—especially those who’ve been hurt (i.e., gays and those who support them, etc.) by the insensitive/dismissive actions of some Christians?


13. AROUND THE CIRCLE: Everyone close your eyes. In silence, imagine Jesus sitting backstage with Lady Gaga and her dancers after one of their shows (it shouldn’t be so hard to do since Scripture tells us that Jesus hung out with all sorts of people that the “righteous” were surprised he actually liked). How do you imagine Jesus speaking to them? How do you imagine Jesus treating them? Then imagine a few of them start to cry, telling Jesus how hurt they’ve felt because of how others have treated them—how do you imagine Jesus responding to these people? Does he reach out and touch them? Embrace them? Stand with his arms crossed while he tells them to get their acts together? Now imagine you’re sitting backstage with Lady Gaga and her dancers—what do you do?

And if any of you have been struggling or wrestling with feeling as though you may be attracted to the same sex—or even if you’ve had same-sex experiences and don’t know who you can talk to—me and the other adult leaders are here to listen to and pray with you whenever you need us. Give us a chance to prove that Jesus is present among this group.

Close in Prayer