Stupid Skits

Pencil Salesman, The

Sales manager and Dumb Salesman enter.

    Manager: Now I want you to pay close attention to me so you can become a great salesman.

    Salesman: Duhh, okay.

    Manager: First you hold your pencils in you hand and say, “Pencils for sale.” Practice saying that.

    Salesman: Pencils for sale, pencils for sale, etc.

    Manager: Okay, that's enough. Next, the first question people will ask you is “How much are they?” and you will say “Ten cents. Three for a quarter.”

    Salesman: “Ten cents. Three for a quarter.”

    Manager: Right. They will ask you, “What color are they?” and you will tell them, “Yellow.”

    Salesman: “Yellow, yellow”

    Manager: Good. Then the person will buy one or else he will say, “No, I don't want to buy one” and you will say, “If you don't, somebody else will.”

    Salesman: If you don't somebody else will.

    Manager: Very good. Now, let's practice it once and then you are on your own. (They go through the questions and answers).

Now the salesman is alone on the street corner calling out “Pencils for sale.” The first customer enters in a hurry, the salesman doesn't notice him, turns around, hits the customer and knocks him to the ground. He gets up, begins to dust off angrily.

    Customer: (outraged) Do you know how much this suit cost me?

    Salesman: Ten cents, three for a quarter.

    Customer: (furious now) What's the matter with you? What do you think I am?

    Salesman: Yellow.

    Customer: Say, would you like me to punch you in the nose?

    Salesman: If you don't somebody else will.

Customer begins to beat the salesman up and both run off stage.

Added by Young Life


Jonathan McKee

Jonathan McKee is the author of over twenty books including the brand new The Guy's Guide to FOUR BATTLES Every Young Man Must Face; The Teen’s Guide to Social Media & Mobile Devices; If I Had a Parenting Do Over; and the Amazon Best Seller - The Guy's Guide to God, Girls and the Phone in Your Pocket. He speaks to parents and leaders worldwide, all while providing free resources for youth workers on Jonathan, his wife Lori, and their three kids live in California.

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