Jack the Giant Slayer (6/18/2013)

Rated PG-13 for intense scenes of fantasy action violence, some frightening images and brief language.

Starring Nicholas Hoult, Ewan McGregor, Eleanor Tomlinson, Stanley Tucci, Warwick Davis, Ian McShane and Bill Nighy

Directed by Bryan Singer (Usual Suspects, X-men and Superman Returns)

Fee-fi-fo-zzzzzz

An age-old war is reignited when a young farmhand unwittingly opens a gateway between our world and a fearsome race of giants. Unleashed on the Earth for the first time in centuries, the long-banished giants strive to reclaim the land they once lost, forcing the young man, Jack (Nicholas Hoult), into the battle of his life to stop them. Fighting for a kingdom, its people, and the love of a brave princess, he comes face to face with the unstoppable warriors he thought only existed in legend…and gets the chance to become a legend himself.

Director Bryan Singer is, in my opinion, one of the most talented directors in Hollywood. But when I looked at his resume, I made a startling discovery. It seems as if Bryan has a track record of making a solid hit followed up by a complete dud. Allow me to make my case.

Bryan’s first film was Public Access, made in 1993. His next film was 1995’s The Usual Suspects (one of my all time favorite films). Next came Apt Pupil, hardly a blockbuster or a critical success. Then he blew things up with X-Men and X2: X-Men United (I’m grouping those two together). The next two films were Superman Returns and Valkyrie, and the trend continued. Based on Jack the Giant Slayer, X-Men: Days of Future Past is going to be AWESOME!!

So how did this classic children’s story with a stellar cast and one of my favorite directors become such a disappointment? The answer is simple, they decided to go “campy” every chance they got. Which would be fine if they were making a children’s movie. But with a PG-13 rating, I wish the film had a more serious tone to it like Sherlock Holmes.

The cast is impressive until you see them on screen. Ewan McGregor and Stanley Tucci are both ridiculous and silly, but Ian McShane as King Brahmwell makes Shrek’s Lord Farquaad look like King Richard.

Another huge let down were the giants…pun intended. They had the chance to make the giants look realistic and scary, but instead they look like rejects from a B horror movie.

Besides being totally campy with low budget effects, the pace is dreadful. Instead of being on the edge of my seat I was trying to stay awake…waiting for the credits.

Hollywood has been cranking out all the classic children’s stories lately. First it was Snow White, then Hansel and Gretel and now Jack and the Bean Stalk…and they were all terrible. I just hope they figure it out before they ruin too many of these classic stories…I say “Skip” this one.

SHOULD KIDS SEE IT?
Although I would say yes for most kids, you should know that the giants may be frightening to younger children.

There is no sex or nudity and the profanity is fairly mild. There was one use of an incomplete F-Word (something like “fuhhh”), with some uses of the D-word and the A-word. There is also some crude humor (farting, burping, nose-picking).

There were moderately intense battle scenes throughout between the giants and humans. Some people getting dismembered, mostly off screen or in the distance, so very little graphic detail and no blood.

CONVERSATION STARTER

1. What were some of the ways Jack showed honor throughout the film?


2. What would’ve been some of the easier options (opposed to showing honor)?


3. When was the last time you were faced with the decision of showing honor or taking the easy way out?


4. Read Psalm 1:1-6
   
   Oh, the joys of those who do not
   follow the advice of the wicked,
   or stand around with sinners,
   or join in with mockers.
   But they delight in the law of the Lord,
   meditating on it day and night.
   They are like trees planted along the riverbank,
   bearing fruit each season.
   Their leaves never wither,
   and they prosper in all they do.
   But not the wicked!
   They are like worthless chaff, scattered by the wind.
   They will be condemned at the time of judgment.
   Sinners will have no place among the godly.
   For the Lord watches over the path of the godly,
   but the path of the wicked leads to destruction.
   
   How does this passage describe the honorable?


5. What does it say about the wicked?


6. How can you live with honor this week?