eZine 08.17.2010

When Our Kids Don’t Want to Reach Out

Last weekend at my CONNECT workshop in Amarillo, TX, a youth pastor named Chris asked me a great question: What do you do when your Christian kids don’t want to reach out to their friends? (At the end of this blog I ask for your response to this question- I encourage you to comment)

This question was rather timely and almost pinched a nerve with me, because the week prior I had just talked with one of my publishers about the possibilities of me writing a book to students about reaching out to their friends (basically, a student version of my Do They Run… book). The publisher literally said, “Sorry, I just don’t see today’s kids buying a book about how to reach their friends.” (Wow. True or not… what a stigma!)

I didn’t attempt to give Chris a quick & simple answer. I really don’t see one “cookie cutter” approach that kids can try on (“Reach your friends in these 3 simple steps!”) But I was able to offer him some ideas that might help him “light the fire” under the butts of students and get them thinking about ministry.

First, I told him that he should take the spiritual pulse of his students and particularly identify his “Stagnant” and “Growing” kids. (For those who haven’t read my book CONNECT where I lay out how to do this spiritual inventory, I provide a quick free video of the “Six Types of Kids“ on our web site. Anyone can do this inventory as described in my book, or as demonstrated in this free video of “The Stickynotes Exercise”.) Unlike the “Looking for Ministry” kids, these other two kids aren’t excited about reaching out to their friends. Once you identify your Stagnant and Growing kids, you begin investing in them, helping them grow spiritually and discover their giftedness.

We talked about this concept much of the weekend at the training workshop: when our “right column” kids take an interest in reaching our “left column” kids.

Here’s just a few of the ideas I went on to share with Chris about how to help these kids not only grow spiritually, but also to challenge them to reach out to others:

Other Topics Jonathan Blogged about Recently:

For more on how NOT to lead games, check out our quick article here, or get Jonathan’s book, The Top 12 Resources Youth Workers Want, where he goes into much more detail and provides examples you can follow.