| TheSource4YM.com | |
 | Jonathan’s Resource Ezine |
Weekly Resources, Ideas and Articles from The Source for Youth Ministry
Tuesday, January 4, 2005
| In This Issue |
- Featured Article: Hulk vs. Nehemiah- An “Anger” Talk/Sermon From Jonathan
- Something You Can Use: A Video Clip and “Ready-made” Anger Discussion
| If you aren’t a subscriber of this EZINE and would like to subscribe – it’s free – just pop on www.TheSource4YM.com and sign up in the upper right hand corner. |
| Featured Article: Hulk vs. Nehemiah |
A NEHEMIAH 5:1-13 TALK/SERMON
Do you like to shop at Costco? Our family loves Costco. Where else can you buy 320 rolls of toilet paper, 20 pounds of Doritos and an entire pallet of dog food? As fun as the store is, something happens when you finish shopping and walk to the front of the store to the checkout counter. Everything changes. Just minutes ago out in the oversized aisles of the store, everyone was happy with big smiles on their faces. Now, as everyone nears the front … they change. Their smiles disappear and their grip tightens on their cart as the competition begins: “Which is the shortest line?!!” Old ladies that look like sweet little old grandmothers will run you down, “MOVE IT OR LOSE IT MISTER!”
I don’t know about you, but I have the gift of choosing when it comes to standing in line. I have the gift of choosing … the LONGEST LINE POSSIBLE! And to make matters worse, when I finally do near the front, a smiling Costco employee will go to the people behind me, who just arrived in line, and tell them, “I can help you over here!”
Now all of us have been equipped with an anger meter, a meter that measures how angry we are. And when it gets in the red … we blow. When that Costco employee comes over and grabs the customers behind me … I come really close to the red zone on my anger meter.
This doesn’t just happen in Costco. This happens in my least favorite stores as well, like the local office supply store. I’ll never forget once last year when my morning at this store had already been a terrible experience- the workers sent me to wrong aisles, gave me bad information, etc. I finally got what I needed and went to stand in line … and there were no checkers. I could only conclude that it was “you don’t have to pay for your stuff today” day at this store, but unfortunately I knew better. To make matters worse, an employee that was standing near the front stapling, NOT HELPING ANYONE, looked up at me, connecting with my eyes … then went right back to her stapling. My anger meter hit the halfway point. But I just stood there doing what we Irish stink at, being patient. Finally she looked up again, looking at me like, “Are you still here?!!” and got on the intercom and said, “customer service up to the front register … customer service!” An elderly man waltzes up behind me, glances at a blank register next to me and goes up to it and puts his purchases down. The checker arrives and starts to help the man. My anger meter hits three quarters. My Irish side couldn’t just stand there, so I spoke up to the man. “I guess you’re first then.” Pa Kettle looks at me surprised and said, “Oh …were you first?”
I retorted, “No, I was just comparing the heights of these magazine racks here. I think aisle three is the tallest one!”
I’m finally helped by a lady who had found her true calling at this helpful store. She starts to run my purchases through but somehow had trouble with every step, including emptying her purse to try to find her glasses. I was buying something for two different businesses so I did two transactions. When I gave her my credit card she asked me for my ID. For the second transaction she asked me if I was going to use the same card. I told her yes. Yes. She asked to check my I.D. again. After pausing in disbelief for a few seconds, I told her “thank you … because I could be someone else this time.” She just looked at me. I wonder when that new STAPLES will be open?
The only thing sad about both these stories is that when I finished these transactions and left the store, within three minutes I entered the zone where anger meters go in the red daily … the California freeway! I’m sure none of you can relate to being frustrated on the road.
Anger is a reality. We all have it. The question is simply, “What do we do with this anger?” Is it wrong?
God, in 3 forms is angry:
- Psalm 7:11 “God is angry with the wicked every day.”
- Mark 3:5 “Jesus looked around at them with anger.”
- I Samuel 11:6 “The spirit of God came upon Saul … and he became angry.”
- 1) Adrenalin is pumped into the bloodstream,
2) Blood pressure increases,
3) Heartbeat accelerates,
4) Eyes dilate for better peripheral vision,
5) Hands sweat,
6) Mouth gets dry,
7) Muscles are supplied with a sudden burst of energy- we are transformed to alarm reaction state.
SO OUR RESPONSE TO ANGER IS WHAT’S IMPORTANT. How should we respond?
Media gives us the answer: If someone makes us mad, kick their butt!
The movie THE HULK hit theatres and video a year or two ago. I admit, I was curious to see it, because when I was a kid I never missed the Friday night TV program THE INCREDIBLE HULK. Do you remember this show? You gotta love this poor guy David Banner who wanders around from town to town … getting his butt kicked. This guy was like the kid in class who had the sign “KICK ME” taped to his back. Every place he went, a group of guys would say, “Hey, look at that guy, let’s kick his butt!” “Yeah, that would be fun!” And so they would begin to beat him up, the whole time while David would say, “Please … .” Pow, Kick, Punch, ” … Don’t” Bam, Pow … “Stop It” … Punch, Smack! Until finally he would receive that one blow that would push him too far and he would look up with those green eyes, his shirt would rip, his pants would rip (except for that one pair of cut offs that would happen to stay on, because this was a family show), he would turn green and muscular and KICK SOME BUTT! And we all loved it. Amish people would secretly scream, “Kill ’em Hulk! You show ?em!” Because it’s the way we would love to express our anger. By kicking some tail!
When I was a kid there was also this show called Kung Fu? Poor Chinese guy (played by white boy, David Carradine) Kwai Chang Caine wonders around the country beating up people that tried to fight him. Every episode, those same guys that tried to get David Banner would try to beat up Kwai Chang Caine, who, of course, would kick their butts. And we would love it.
Well that was back then. Now we have Steven Seagal, who not only kicks their butts, but he breaks them in half. That’s even better. That makes our anger feel great… or does it?
Last year our local paper followed a true story of two guys that got in a disagreement on the road. One guy gets out of his car, right in front of his young son, and shoots the other guy. This guy ends up going to jail, and shortly after, kills himself in prison, leaving his son fatherless.
Movies usually leave that part out of the story. Sure, it might feel good to just explode and hurt someone or something, but … is that the end result we really want?
Eph. 4:26-27 says that “when you’re angry, do not sin. Stop being angry before the end of the day. Don’t give the Devil a foothold.”
We already established that anger isn’t wrong. I think the question is, how do we take this natural emotion and NOT give the Devil a foothold? How can we control our anger when we get angry?
Nehemiah shows us a great example of how to do this. He not only gets angry for good reason, but responds in a way where the end result is positive. Let’s look at the text. (Read 5:1-13.)
Jonathan McKee is the author of the new book, Do They Run When They See You Coming: Reaching Out to Unchurched Teenagers and President of “The Source for Youth Ministry”, a nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, cutting-edge resources for youth workers across the world. Jonathan is an author, speaker, and trainer who began his career speaking to unchurched junior high students on campus. He continues to speak at school assemblies, events, and camps, in addition to training adult and student leaders nationally.
| Something You Can Use: A Video Clip and “Ready-made” Anger Discussion |
Main Point: Can we redirect anger into something good?
Attention Grabber: Movie – The Waterboy, 1998 (Adam Sandler), PG-13 (for language and crude sexual humor – though neither are in these scenes).
In this movie the weakling water boy becomes the star of the football team, popular, and gets the girl in the end, all as a result of tapping into the anger within him and living it out on and off the field. It is a comedy but has a bunch of questionable things such as language that you should be aware of, but there is a great clip for talking about anger.
Clip: Tackling Fuel
Set your counter to 0.00.00 from the initial Touchstone logo appears. Fast fwd. to about 20 minutes in. Bobby (the water boy) comes out onto the field dressed to play for the first time. Start the clip right after the coach sends off the special teams to run laps. The rest of the clip is about the water boy tapping into his anger as his tackling fuel. STOP at about 23.52 after Bobby agrees to tackle for Coach like that every game.
Transitional Statement:
Some of us might wonder about anger. Is anger in itself bad? As you can see, Bobby can react pretty bad when he’s angered. I’m sure some of us can relate to that. But once Bobby redirected his anger toward something good, his anger wasn’t a bad thing. Let’s examine anger a little closer in our small groups.
Small Group Questions:
1. What’s something that makes you very angry? How do you usually react to that?
2. Is it ever good to be angry? How do you know?
3. Look up two passages:
- Eph 4:26-27 (NLT)
And “don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, [27] for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil.
John 2:13-16 (NLT)
It was time for the annual Passover celebration, and Jesus went to Jerusalem. [14] In the Temple area he saw merchants selling cattle, sheep, and doves for sacrifices; and he saw money changers behind their counters. [15] Jesus made a whip from some ropes and chased them all out of the Temple. He drove out the sheep and oxen, scattered the money changers’ coins over the floor, and turned over their tables. [16] Then, going over to the people who sold doves, he told them, “Get these things out of here. Don’t turn my Father’s house into a marketplace!”
4. In the video clip, Bobby redirected his anger to be used as tackling fuel. Can you think of an example where anger can be used to fuel something good?
5. Read the following passage:
(In the book of Nehemiah, Nehemiah has been dealing with a lot of tragedy. He’s trying to rebuild the walls that were destroyed, his enemies have been attacking, and now … his own people are attacking from within. They are ripping off their own people who are in dire need. So Nehemiah gets ticked!)
Neh. 5:6-7 (NLT)
When I heard their complaints, I was very angry. [7] After thinking about the situation, I spoke out against these nobles and officials. I told them, “You are oppressing your own relatives by charging them interest when they borrow money!” Then I called a public meeting to deal with the problem.
In verse 6 Nehemiah gets angry? Is it wrong to be angry at someone who rips someone else off?
6. What is the first thing Nehemiah does when he’s angry? (Look at the beginning of verse 7) (Yep, he thought it over. He didn’t just react- he gave himself time to cool down.)
7. Then what did he do to deal with the situation? Did he charge in there and cut off heads? (He came up with a rational way to deal with it. He called a meeting to confront the truth).
8. Nehemiah admitted he was angry, he stopped and thought it over, then he came up with a rational way to fix the situation. How can you apply this to how you deal with frustrating situations this week?
Wrap Up:
(This is a good place to share a personal story where you redirected your anger into something good.) We can learn from Nehemiah. When we face frustrating situations, we can: 1) admit that we’re angry, 2) stop and think, and 3) communicate a well thought out solution.
CLICK HERE FOR JONATHAN’S SERMON/TALK ON THIS PASSAGE, “Hulk Vs. Nehemiah!”
“Waterboy” clip idea by Mark Janzen
| Jonathan’s New Book is Here: And We’re Giving Away a Free “Outreach Resource CD” With Every Order |
Jonathan’s new book is here!
So can you still get the free CD?
Good question: Because we’ve got less than 1,000 of our 2005 Outreach Resource CD’s left-and we’re giving them away for free to anyone who orders now.
Now, we know that you can go down to your neighborhood Christian book store today and buy this book. That’s why we’re throwing something in for free, just to say “Thanks for buying it from us!”
This is the book that everyone’s talking about. Saddleback’s Kurt Johnston says it best:
“Most youth workers feel like we just aren’t reaching enough students for Christ-at least that’s how I feel. In this book, Jonathan took me on a journey that was both convicting and encouraging at the same time! Instead of a few “happy hops to Heaven,” Jonathan provides a holistic approach to reaching this generation of un-churched students.”
Recommended by Mark Oestreicher, Bo Boshers, Jim Burns, Walt Mueller, Chap Clark, Wayne Rice, and more!
AND GET THE FREE CD
Delivered free via e-mail to subscribers each week. We encourage you to distribute this newsletter freely and ask only that you not change its contents.
HAVE YOU MISSED PAST “EZINE” ARTICLES?
CLICK HERE FOR JONATHAN’S “EZINE” ARCHIVES
And for more FREE resources and ideas … go to THE SOURCE
www.TheSource4YM.com
Copyright ?2005 The Source for Youth Ministry
All rights reserved.
Jonathan McKee
Jonathan McKee is the author of over twenty books including the brand new The Guy's Guide to FOUR BATTLES Every Young Man Must Face; The Teen’s Guide to Social Media & Mobile Devices; If I Had a Parenting Do Over; and the Amazon Best Seller - The Guy's Guide to God, Girls and the Phone in Your Pocket. He speaks to parents and leaders worldwide, all while providing free resources for youth workers on TheSource4YM.com. Jonathan, his wife Lori, and their three kids live in California.