You need two actors for this. It can be done with 2 boys or 2 girls or one of each. One of them needs to be willing to get a little gross.
Also, you will need two cell phones, a couple of toys (like action figures), a bandana, a drop cloth, and a banana.
Open the scene by having one actor on each side of the stage kinda turned away from one another.
JOE: (seated on a drop cloth playing with action figures and a banana) Oh no Spider Man, look, it’s the banana of death! He has come to destroy us. Aaauuuugggghhhh! (continue to banter back and forth between the heroes and the evil banana)
RENE: (is happily playing with a bandana enjoying folding it) Hey, I should call Joe! (she picks up her cell phone and pretends to call Joe by punching numbers and making a ringing noise)
JOE: (picks up his cell phone) Yo…Hello!
RENE: It's Rene. Where were you today?
JOE: I was sick.
RENE: Sick?! Yeah right. What did you have?
JOE: Um…I…Uhhh…I had Ganoderma Butt Rot. (an actual palm tree disease)
RENE: Whatever! You missed some really fun stuff in school today.
JOE: Oh yeah? Like what?
RENE: We learned how to fold bandanas.
JOE: Bananas!? (strangely looking at the banana he is playing with) How do you do that?
RENE: Well, first you have to have and bandana.
JOE: I actually have one right here! Go ahead and tell me. (Make sure he is seated on the drop cloth to contain the mess.)
RENE: Ok, but first let me put you on speaker phone (press a button and then lay the phone down) You start by taking the bandana and making it nice and flat.
JOE: Um…ok. (he tries his best to flatten the banana by pulling it out of its peel and using his hands to smack it flat)
RENE: Ok, now you fold it from one corner to the next so that it looks like a triangle.
JOE: Alright….ummm...but…(he folds the banana as best he can)
RENE: Now you put it on your forehead with the point of the triangle towards the back of your head.
JOE: (look as if he is scared) Are you sure about this?
RENE: Yes, yes. Now tie a knot in the back, behind your neck. That’s it! Isn’t it fantastic!!
JOE: (after he puts the banana on his head he becomes sorely UNDERimpressed) So let me get this straight, all you learned how to do in school today was tie a stupid banana around your neck? (make sure to emphasize the word banana)
RENE: (not understanding) Banana? I didn’t say banana, I said bandana! (emphasize the word bandana)
JOE: (embarrassed) Uh….(making a static-y noise)…you’re breaking up….I’m losing you…(runs off the stage)
RENE: (chuckling) Banana. What an idiot! (walking off stage) Where did he get that idea from?
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