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Music Discussions

Set Fire to the Rain
A Quick Music Discussion Guide
02/22/2011

Main Point of Discussion: Not all relationships are good and healthy for us. We need to model our relationships with others after God’s Word. Then we’ll please Him.

The Music Video: Set Fire to the Rain
Adele's Set Fire to the Rain is a very popular tune. The singer/song writer has amassed tons of awards at a very young age. The success of Adele's 21 earned her numerous mentions on the Guinness World Book of Records. The fact is, so many people identify themselves with the stories told in her music because she addresses topics like anger, abuse, and sex-out-of-marriage.

Introducing the Music Video:
Adel’s Set Fire to the Rain is a very popular song among people of all ages, not just teens. It's a nice tune in fact. In the song, she talks about the quality of relationship she has with her significant other. It’s not exactly the best. She sings about him telling lies, etc. As Christians, how should we go about seeking relationships? What should we look for in someone to love? Let’s listen to how Adele does it and see what we can take away from her experiences and mistakes.

Show the Music Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pufx9Cq_TOQ&feature=related

Set Fire to the Rain

I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell, you rose claim it.
It was dark, and I was over,
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me.
My hands, they're strong, but my knees were far too weak.
Stand in your arms without falling into your feet.
But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true.
And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win.

But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face
Let it burn while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name.

When laying with you, I could stay there.
Close my eyes, feel you here forever.
You and me together, nothing is better.
'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true.
And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win.

But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face
Let it burn while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name.
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Where I felt somethin' die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time.

Sometimes I wake up by the door
Now that you've gone, must be waiting for you
Even that when it's already over
I can't help myself from looking for you

I set fire to the rain
Watched it pour as I touched your face
Let it burn while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name.
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Where I felt something die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time

Let it burn

Transitional Statement:
In Set Fire to the Rain, Adele is clearly saying she was hurt in the process of this relationship until she tried to let go. She mentions that he had trouble telling the truth, and that, while he was strong in the beginning of their relationship, he faltered. Maybe you’ve been in a relationship like that. Maybe you’ve been burned. What do we look for in relationships these days? Do we try to please God with who we date? Does He ever even cross our minds as we go looking for love? If not, why not? Let’s spend a few minutes talking about that.


Divide into Small Groups:
Let’s go ahead and split up into our discussion groups, and then afterward we’ll come back together for a final word.

CLICK HERE for a quick training article on how to maximize your small groups using our small group format—a great resource to equip your small group leaders.

Discussion Questions:

  1. AROUND THE CIRCLE: Let's take a moment to share our names and one of our favorite “relationship” songs.

  2. ASK A FEW: What parts of this song reveal that Adele was struggling in her relationship with him?

  3. ASK A FEW: Have you guys ever experienced something like this, or know someone who did? Explain.

  4. ASK A FEW: What does Adele mean when she says she “set fire to the rain”? (Leaders - During an interview about the meaning behind the songs Adele described this song as "burning the pain and getting rid of it and demolishing it...and its sort of like a liberating song because you know when you break up and the other person who you've left or who has left you knows how much you love them and they try and make your life hell and make it so that you can never get over them by constantly being in touch...its kind of like that and its about taking it into your own hands and just saying go away....)

  5. ASK A FEW: How difficult is it to get over someone? Why?

  6. ASK A FEW: How do you deal with people when they wrong you?

  7. ASK A FEW: Adele talks about trying to move past the guy, but struggles to do so. Do you think she has forgiven him? Why or why not?

  8. ASK A FEW: How does the Lord defines forgiveness?

  9. Read the following passage:

      Ephesians 4:25-32

      Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

  10. ASK A FEW: What are some of the things Paul tells us to do in this passage?

  11. ASK A FEW: How could this passage impact our relationships if we truly lived by it?

  12. ASK A FEW: Which qualities in this passage are most absent in today’s relationships?

  13. ASK A FEW: How might Adele’s relationship have been different if her significant other had lived by this passage?

  14. ASK A FEW: Based on this passage, what kind of advice would God give Adele for a future relationship?

  15. ASK A FEW: If you’re in a relationship currently, how does it compare to this passage?

  16. AROUND THE CIRCLE: What can you do immediately to make sure that your relationships look like this lifestyle from the Bible?

Wrap Up:
Tonight we had the opportunity to watch a very popular music video and then discuss the numerous messages Adele tried to transmit to her fans about relationship woes. We learned that in every relationship, there are challenges, and sadly, in many relationships, there are unwanted things like lying, cheating, playing games, etc.

But then we took a look at what God's Word had to say about relationships. In God’s Word, Paul outlines several things that we should do and not do in the lives of others when we say that we love them. He gave us lots of things to think about, and ways we can improve the quality of our relationships. If we live by God’s Word, our lives and relationships will be very different.

The temptation is to just throw our hands up when we’re in a bad relationship and think that this is just the way it’s got to be. It doesn’t. We need to have the courage to live our lives by God’s Word, and expect others to do the same. If they don’t, then we need to, as Adele says, set fire to the rain.

Let’s take a few moments and pray about our relationships. Let’s ask God to give us insight into what needs to change, if stuff needs to change. Let’s ask God for courage to make those changes. And let’s ask God to show us how to better live out His Word in our relationships.

Close in Prayer

Written by Paschoal T.

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